Nuke's Blog
Periodic ramblings by an old geek…

Has it really been over a month since I last posted movie reviews?  This is going to hurt.  I really watch too many movies.  Hopefully the length of this post doesn’t crash my website, or your web browser for that matter!

 

Gamer (2009)

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I’ll throw this one up first, since I actually watched it in a theater.  This thing was trashed by critics, but I really enjoyed the experience.  I suppose it partially has to do with all the “first-person shooter” (FPS) games I played throughout college, and this did a neat job of bringing them to life.  It also brought back fond memories of The Running Man.  Gerard Butler continues to win me over with most movies I’ve seen him in.  Oh, and the absolute greatest part of this movie is how they brought The Sims game to life.  It’s so hilarious to see the names, clothing, etc. that you see in the “real-life” game portrayed in the movie.  You’ll have to see it to believe it.

 

G-Force (2009)

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Here’s is another movie that (a) I saw in the theater, and (b) critics thoroughly trashed.  If you have pre-teen kids, I think you really need to see this.  I found several jokes a bit tiring in the movie, but it had several hilarious moments to trump them.  The spy stuff was quite fun… I enjoyed this far better than the Spy Kids movies.  While watching it, I thought it felt like they were trying to combine the two adult blockbusters, G.I. Joe and Transformers 2, into a single movie for young kids.  It certainly captured the fun of both, even though it was done through annoying little rodents.

 

Gran Torino (2008)

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Anyone remember the fun you had watching Clint Eastwood in his Dirty Harry films, or even the Man with No Name trilogy?  Here we finally have the rough and tough Clint of old again… and yeh, he really is looking old.  He fits the role perfectly in this movie, as he should.  It can be a tough film to make it through, but well worth the watch.  My favorite scene of the movie is when he stops a few street punks from messing up the daughter living next door.  You simply have to see it.

 

Merlin: Season 1 (2008)

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This is not a top-notch production, which is why it doesn’t quite creep up to the 4 stars I end up giving to most shows I like.  If you enjoy Arthurian lore, you should definitely check out this show which is basically the Smallville-like version of the story.  I watched all the episodes for the season on NBC’s website, which seemed to work pretty well.  It’s basically Each episode brings new characters from the larger legend into the fray, though it seems to dispose of them almost as quickly.  It feels like it can’t last for too many seasons, which I find as somewhat of a good thing.  I already watch too many online or on DVD as it is.

 

The Legend of the Seeker: Season 1 (2008)

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This show is similar to Merlin in the sense that (a) it is about cool medieval legend stuff, and (b) it is not a top-notch production.  So, that leaves it in the 3-star category as well.  I plan to continue watching future seasons, as I enjoyed almost all the episodes in the season.  I’m really not sure how next season is going to work out, though, as it sure seemed like the story was at an ending point, rather than the cliffhanger most shows’ seasons annoyingly end with these days.

 

Bottle Shock (2008)

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This film showed up on Netflix Instant Watching, and I had nothing better to watch that night.  I was greatly surprised by how fun and interesting the story of the Paris Wine Tasting of 1976 would be.  If you don’t know the story, this was the wine competition where California’s Napa Valley secured its place in the world of wine, opening the door for wine from many countries outside of France.  Alan Rickman is always fun to watch, even if his role was a bit marginalized in the movie.  Random side note… it was quite funny seeing Chris Pine (played Kirk in the recent Star Trek blockbuster) looking like a hippie.

 

Defiance (2008)

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This film about the Bielski partisans‘ efforts to rescue Jews during WWII was hard to watch, like most films about the holocaust.  It was quite well done, and was a story I had never heard before.  Daniel Craig turned in a strong performance, but I have to admit I couldn’t really deal with Liev Schreiber.  Having recently seen him in X-Men Origins: Wolverine, I kept expecting to see claws shooting out of his hands every time he was on-screen.  That certainly messes you up when you’re watching a serious movie about historical events, and is probably key to the movie not attaining 4 stars.

 

Horsemen (2009)

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Eek.  I really don’t like this type of movie anymore.  I apparently misunderstood descriptions of the movie when I added it to my queue.  I was expecting an apocalyptic movie, but instead is was a horror movie along the lines of Se7en.  I really enjoyed that movie several years ago, but I guess I was a different person back then.  And, that was simply a better movie anyway.  Steer clear of this one.

 

Echelon Conspiracy (2009)

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This movie follows a very similar concept to that in Eagle Eye, but is a much lower-quality production.  I’m not sure why it ended up in my Netflix queue, but it was entertaining enough to hold my attention most of the time.  Check it out if you liked Eagle Eye and can’t find anything else worth watching.

 

Empire of the Sun (1987)

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Before deciding to play this through Netflix Instant Watching, I noticed it said “a young Christian Bale” (the current reigning Batman) was in the film.  I was probably watching the movie for well over 30 minutes before I realized that the 10-year-old-or-so boy in the film actually WAS Christian Bale.  I kept thinking to myself that they did a great job finding a child actor who looked like him, expecting any moment to see a cut to him being more grown up.  Guess I never paid attention to the 1987 release date, doh.  Anyway, this Spielberg film was a very long, but well-done coming-of-age film about a boy trying to make it through WWII “alone”.  John Malkovich played his now-usual guy-you-love-to-hate to a T.  The story itself is very interesting, but it ends up taking too long to progress and attain a 4-star rating.

 

Inkheart (2008)

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This films causes some major internal conflict with me.  I hate liking a movie with Brendan Fraser in it.  It just doesn’t seem like it should be possible for a film to overcome its lead actor, but this one (and a couple of The Mummy movies) made it happen.  Jake already stole some of my thunder with this one, so I’ll let you read his post instead, and will leave you with this: if you have young kids and want to actually enjoy a movie they can watch, definitely check it out.

 

The International (2009)

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Clive Owen failed me.  I don’t really know how to detail some of the reason I didn’t like the movie, because honestly, it’s been too long since I’ve seen it.  I just know I was very disappointed by the end.  Why does it take me so long to get around to posting these reviews anyway?!  I guess now *I* failed *you*.

 

Confessions of a Shopaholic (2009)

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Here’s another film that ended up in my queue in my limitless search for a movie T might sit down to watch with me and enjoy.  I’m slightly embarrassed that I actually liked this movie.  It was dorky and very girly.  But it was a fun film in the middle of several serious ones, and I guess that simply has to come through in my ratings from time to time.  By the way… am I the only one who confuses Isla Fisher (in this film) with Amy Adams (of Enchanted fame)?  I really thought they were the same person until I was sitting there watching the credits to this movie.

 

Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li (2009)

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Speaking of Smallville, here we have Kristin Kreuk playing a quite different role than her Lana Lang.  I hardly played the game as a kid, but my brother certainly put his time in with it… maybe he would recognize some of the characters better than I did.  I remember the powers of the fighters being much cooler than depicted in the movie.  It turned out fairly boring.  Unless you loved playing the game, or maybe you are in love with Kristin, I recommend skipping this one.

 

The Unit: Season 1 (2006)

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I’m not sure how I missed hearing about this TV show, but Ryan and Valene let me know about it recently so I added it to my queue.  Considering much of this is modeled on the real-life Delta Force, it is both fairly cool and somewhat startling in a way that 24 simply will never attain.  However, real-life events (most times) don’t end up as entertaining as completely made-up shows.  When you start with real events, and slowly run out of real material, you end up with a lesser show… and it seems to occur with this one as the season progressed.  I’ll still watch the next season at some point, though.

 

Coraline (2008)

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I found myself constantly comparing this movie with Tim Burton’s Nightmare Before Christmas, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing.  I like both movies for similar and yet different reasons.  I originally put this in J’s Netflix queue, but considering her reaction to NBCa year ago, I decided to send it back.  She would be too freaked out watching several of the scenes.  I haven’t read Neil Gaiman’s novel, so I can’t guess how well it matches the book.  I really enjoyed his books American Gods and Anansi Boys, so maybe I”ll check it out someday.  Sure would be nice if someone could make those two into movies as well.

 

Battle 360 (2008)

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Outstanding.  I had never read much about the Enterprise’s battles in the Pacific during WWII, so this was a great learning experience.  The History Channel does a tremendous job bringing these battles to life, in a very similar way to their Dogfightsseries.  I could watch these over and over again, and Lafe already does (though he needs to slow down with the fishing thing… he’s losing his edge on “war” stuff lately ;).  If you’re a fan of WWII history, you simply must check this series out.  We own it, so let me know if you want to borrow the DVDs.

 

Dogfights: Season 2 (2008)

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Still a great show in the second season, but some of it became a bit old by the end.  I found Battle 360 to be much better, as you have a continuing story line throughout the entire season.  I continue to look forward to more seasons of this show, however.  The animation and narration is really great in all of these episodes.

 

Crossing Over (2009)

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Certainly interesting to see another filmmaker’s attempt at bringing the illegal immigration debate to the big screen.  However, I simply didn’t get much out of it.  I’m always sad when disappointed by another movie Harrison Ford is in.  I really want him “back”.  Maybe they can make another, better Indiana Jones movie soon. ;)

 

He’s Just Not That Into You (2009)

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Yep, I subjected myself to another chick flick this month.  T loved The Wedding Singer and Never Been Kissed, so I figure some film with Drew Barrymore in it (however marginalized her part is) will eventually be another winner.  In this case, while there are some really funny parts, I think I have been met with further failure in my search for a T-acceptable film.  I most enjoyed Justin Long’s several explanations to Ginnifer Goodwin on how we guys are never signaling women.  We simply aren’t smart enough to think so deep about such things.

 

Titan A.E. (2000)

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In my search for a Drew Barrymore chick flick T would enjoy, I decided to try this chick flick out in addition to the previous one.  Ok, this isn’t a chick flick, though Drew does happen to be the voice behind one of the animated characters.  This had several poor reviews, but actually included some pretty cool animation, anda decent story line.  Not sure why it took me almost a decade to finally watch it.  I’m also not sure I understand why some people dislike it so much.

 

The Mutant Chronicles (2008)

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Personally, I would stick with other zombie/apocalyptic films.  I simply can’t recommend this film unless you absolutely have to see every film in that genre.  It has some really neat scenes, almost along the lines of Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, but even those were not enough to prevent the weak story line from degrading the experience.

 

Fast & Furious (2009)

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Wow… is this really the fourth film in the franchise?  And while I’m asking questions, did they forget what made the third film (Tokyo Drift) so much better than the first two?  Like… they actually had some really good car driving going on?  Or… they seemed to almost try to have a decent story line?  The several-miles-long secret tunnel they kept driving through to cross the Mexican border was ridiculous.  Yes, I know, the whole franchise is somewhat ridiculous, but this one topped the rest in that area.  You have to see it to believe it.  My words simply can’t do it justice.

 

Julia (2008)

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This movie was simply too long.  It had a decent plot going, and Tilda Swinton was an absolutely wonderful drunk throughout the entire movie.  But it was too long.  And, it’s too real of a portrayal of a kid in danger… something that I actually agree with Ebert on… that kids in danger (or actually killed) automatically results in 1-2 stars being docked from a rating.  Anyway, the ending was also very annoying, especially having sat through the first 2.5 hours to get there.  If you want to see some great acting from Tilda, though, check it out (and maybe only watch the first 1.5 hours).

 

Angel Wars: The Messengers (2009)

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I’ve really enjoyed all the Angel Wars DVDs (we own the earlier Guardian Forcetrilogy).  The kids really love watching them, as they make Bible stuff “cool”, if you will.  The lessons taught in each episode are well done.  The one where we see the lead character battling greed, pride, impatience, etc. in his desire for wings is especially good.  I could watch the kids love his cool, new “power” and only later realize it was turning him away from God.  It provided us with another one of those teachable moments where they really “got” something.  Can’t wait for more of these.

 

Heroes: Season 3 (2008)

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Well, this hurts.  I have completionist tendencies, which means once I start buying something in a series, I have to keep buying it whether or not it’s bad.  Here we have a show I absolutely loved in the beginning (and hence bought the DVDs), but now am finding so horribly difficult to follow as things continue.  It’s like they are trying to out-do Lost, and are quickly failing.  While I enjoy further research to dig deeper into complex shows or films, I don’t necessarily like the feeling that I’m being forced into doing that.  Can someone explain to me what happened with all the bajillion characters, timelines, etc. this season???  Good grief.   Guess I’ll have to buy the DVDs and watch it all again.

 

Yesterday (2002)

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Somewhat interesting Korean sci-fi thriller that Netflix recommended for me, but not good enough to make 3 stars.  The previews and description almost made it seem like it would be another Blade Runner, but it certainly wasn’t.  I should have left it in my Instant Watching queue for a night when I was really bored, rather than letting it eat up one of my delivered DVDs.  Oh well.

 

Two Lovers (2008)

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I enjoy most movies with Joaquin Phoenix, and here he turns in another fine performance as a character you aren’t necessarily sure you should like.  It’s a well-done character study, and can certainly recommend it to people who like those types of dramas.  Don’t expect to love Gwyneth Paltrow’s character this time around, though.

 

Psych: Season 2 (2007)

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I purposely saved this review for near the end of my post, as I seem to disagree with almost everyone else who watches Psych.  It’s just too darn corny for me, and yes, I know they are doing it on purpose.  I just don’t find the stories that well-crafted.  Yes, I can deal with corniness in a show, but it has to be smarter than this one.  If I want smart and corny, I will continue to stick with Big Bang Theory.  Though, I may finally cave-in to Jake and Grant’s demands and watch the 3rd season of Psych.  We’ll see.

 

Race to Witch Mountain (2009)

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Thank you, Dwayne Johnson, for another surprisingly decent movie, against all odds.  The story line seems pretty wimpy, and I don’t really think the kids acted all that well in the movie, but “The Rock” actually seemed to hold the movie together well enough.  The kids certainly loved it, and I found myself sitting down with them to watch it a 2nd time, which means an automatic 3+ stars.

 

Becket (1964)

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I can’t watch only “recent” movies, or I would go insane.  Looking back at this post, I actually can’t believe how many post-2000 movies I watched over the past month.  Anyway, Peter O’Toole and Richard Burton certainly played an interesting (and contrasting) pair in this classic about Henry II’s conflict with the Church.  It is a time investment, so consider other options if you don’t like 2.5-hour period pieces.

 

Julius Caesar (1953)

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Speaking of lengthy period pieces, thankfully this one was only 2 hours.  The problem for me is that it closely followed Shakespeare, rather than taking complete liberty with the story.  I still find it hard after all these years to enjoy and even follow straight-up Shakespeare.  Marlon Brando certainly can overact like no other, though.  It’s worth checking out just to see his performance blow the other actors’ away.

 

The Cheetah Girls (2003)

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Ugh.  Here’s one of those reasons why a little girl should not have her own Netflix queue.  Or at least not one that she is allowed to “manage.”  I think it’s time to takeover full control again.  I really don’t need to get her any more silly-girls-singing-about-everything-all-the-time movies.  Though, this little girl is still cute… so maybe she can control the queue just a little while longer. ;)

 

Beverly Hills Chihuahua (2008)

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I was wrong.  She should not be allowed to manage her own queue.  The family saw this in the theater without me, so I assumed when she added it to her queue to see a 2nd time that it must be worth watching.  Wrong.  So wrong.  No quiero Taco… nevermind.

 

Space Buddies (2009)

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Thank goodness.  J actually said, “I don’t want any more little baby kids’ movies, Dad… just send it back.”  Of course, I had to watch it (though, in super-fast-forward mode) before complying with her wishes.  For the love of all that is cute and cuddly, please Disney… stop making “Bud” movies.

 

If you actually made it through this entire post, I’m interested to hear it.  I simply won’t believe it.  After all this typing and mouse-clicking, I think I almost loosened up my right elbow to 2 or 3 degrees of motion from its normal 0 degrees. ;)  It’s going to hurt something fierce in the morning, though.

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